mein haus sagt zu mir:”verlaß mich nicht, denn hier wohnt deine vergangenheit”.
und die straße sagt zu mir:”komm und folge mir, denn ich bin deine zukunft”.
und ich sage zu beiden, zu meinem haus und zu der straße:
“ich habe weder vergangenheit, noch habe ich zukunft.
wenn ich hier bleibe, ist ein gehen in meinem verweilen;
und wenn ich gehe, ist ein verweilen in meinem gang….”

i know the answers are there. everything is there, for us, i don’t need to worry, i just need to know what i want! find the answers.

whilst i almost was worrying if my decision concerning malta was wrong i realized what this short trip was good for: there i found that we could get along well in a strange country. that i could easily imagine to live there. nothing frightening. so this will also be possible in any other place. yay! makes me feel much better!

gozo is a small island & xlendi a really quiet location, nothing happening there except of tourism in the summer. there is no supermarket, no greengrocer, no school (well, we wouldn’t miss it ), no museum, no library … but all this can be found in victoria, gozo’s capital, which is only 4km away. the landscape is stony & barren, at least from may to octobre. at the moment, there are a lot of wild herbs growing there. i don’t know most of them yet. i somehow like the landscape, hilly, scenic, & i love the sea so living at one time on the mediterranean coast would be great! mediterranean climate … the house is nice, too. 3 large rooms, simple equipment, some walls are a little bit brittle … internet access is available which is very important for me & my son!

but – there is one big problem: it is almost impossible to get organic (or even untreated) fruit & vegetables. no organic food stores, no organic offers in the supermarkets. very few fruits growing there, figs, prickly pears & melons in the summer would be fine, but everything else is treated with pesticides. most things imported. no tropenkost-supplies, no asian markets (i. e., no coconuts or other tropic fruit). c became ill during our few days there on eating treated strawberries and other fruit. i don’t know how to live there for a year or more as raw-vegans. especially on raising a raw-vegan child …

???